an oyster shell / warped smiles in the sliding patio door / photos disconnected / from
subjects / we traipsed the shore / collected mementoes / for a bucket list honeymoon
/  as the Aotearoa moon shone a light  / on what was beneath / flooded the threshold
of the motel room / quadrangle deserted / but for us /     show me again that car park

vista  /  I’ll point out  / what was not visible then  /  in that view perfect for watching
dolphins  /  I’ll hear the alarm cut thickly through dreams  /   an early start to observe
them  /  so we did not have to observe each other  /  in our unnatural habitat  /   slow
evening / car beams threaded / underneath the door / such thin insubstantial towels

/  rough as fine grained sandpaper  /  sloughed our sunburned skin  /  exfoliated all   /
but what stubborn fear remained / if love accompanied us / I couldn’t tell you now /
I remember   /   not passion   /   but a wind-withered intensity   /   sweetened   /    like
botrytised wine / not warmth / the nights / were so much sharper / and more acidic

than we expected /   but a mattress hard and forbidding like a precipice   /   two spare
pillows in the closet  /   smelling of artificial lavender   /    show me again that car park
vista  / we’ll schlepp in espadrilles / to the dock / paperbacks in hand / holiday shorts
hoisted / we’ll bite into / vivid green-lipped mussels / glassy flesh turned opaque /

we’ll wade steady shallows    /    spumy eddies    /   and I will once again discard   /   an
outgrown carapace  /  soft-phased  /  ill-fitting  /  in that place  /  I did not expect  / to
find resolution  /  how to un-net and bask  /  when the ropes burned so  /  back when
you were still  /  bright and corporeal / a visceral mass / now flaked in remembrance /

how can we ever be sure  /  we know somebody at all  /  your hand was so cold  /  as it
broke the surface / in Kaikōura / where the first doubt seedlings took root.